The day that changed the World..

I don't think any of us wud forget what we were doing on September 11th 2001.

I was the Project Manager on a 8 million dollar project called Jimmy Carter Blvd in Gwinnett County, Atlanta, GA.

My first Independent project as a Project Manager, after I was trained and equipped by my employer in the arts and science of building roads n bridges. It was exciting time to be managing a path breaking project, and I was looking forward to its completion.

The kinds of reception, whistles and applause you get, after removing all barriers and traffic control devices to allow that first motorist to go thru, on the road you just build, still gives me a high.

I had just returned from my graveyard shift and was sleeping when my in-house girl frnd woke me up to break the news.

What we saw brought shock, disbelief, horror, fear and confusion. Like most Americans, I thought it must be a mistake but then the second plane hit and then I knew its more than that.

All day was spend in watching TV and absorbing the images of fear, tears and sufferings. For weeks stories that emerged kept me troubled. I still feel for the guys n gals that chose to jump from top floors...

Our World changed that day for worst.

Soon news stories started showing up of how the Arab looking or Muslims are targeted and humiliated in public places. Fortunately, I was in a great company of frnds and co-workers. Not a single incident that made me feel I am a Muslim or an outsider.

On the other hand when me and bunch of coworkers / hommies were entering a cafeteria, the African American security person stopped them for a check up and allowed me to go without frisking. After I passed thru security, I realized what she did, my humor kicked in, so I went back to her asking

" Hey you did not check me, I cud be a terrorist?"

"Not with that face honey...not with that face....go on..."

That is the American spirit that always rises from the ashes. That is the spirit we need to nurture in each other - if we want the world to not slide in the one way slope of darkness, bigotry and fear.

World can be beautiful again....yes it can...

Khul Jaa Sim Sim...

When I got there, the tea shop was already closed for the night. The staff was standing outside unwinding - chatting.

" Chai khareedni hai"
" Kal Subah 9 baje aayen....abhi to dukaan band ho gayi"

The manager wearing a skull cap and kurta pajama spoke in a matter of fact tone.

"Kal subah hi nahi hogi bhai"
"Kiya matlab?"
"Aap ki chai pee ke meri subah hoti hai......chai nahi hai ghar pe.....suabh kaise hogi?"

The manager, giving keys of the shop to one of his employees shouted
" Aye Dukaan khol"

I smiled. I got what I wanted, and was not surprised. Have done these kinds of acts a million times by now.

In one of the stories of " The Arabian Nights", the prince's path was blocked by a boulder on the mouth of a cave. He recites a mantra " Khul Jaa Sim Sim " and the boulder gives him room to go in and rescue the princess.

Vidyawaan of the world tell us it was not the mantra that opened the mouth of the cave, bu the " Lehjaa" ( the way to speak) that did it.

I could not agree more...

I can open any door, anywhere, any time in ANY country - even in my sleep with my "timing" and "Lehjaa". This magic comes only when one has a transparent heart, a sense of humor and who cares attitude to the outcome.

Despite this a few doors just wouldnt open....

Thats the irony my frnd....thats the fascinating irony!!

Why women are not allowed in Mosques in India?

There are hundreds of other examples I can name where female worshipers were allowed in the mosque like Jama Masjid of Mandu, Feroz Shah Mosque in Hissar, Haryana, Jahan Ara mosque in Agra and Jama Masjid of Chanderi (MP), not to mention in the US all mosques have room for them.

Which genius came up with the idea that Aurat = Gunah in India?

Please enlighten....

PS: My frnd Mirza loved the sight of his then In-house girl frnd looking for him in a vast crowd after Juma prayers.....u feel like a MAN, he says as "she used to ignore everyone else"....LOL

http://scroll.in/article/803090/what-history-proves-indian-mosques-barring-women-is-only-a-recent-trend

Foreign students and evil west...

GA Tech, 1990

It was drizzling when I come out of the Civil Engineering building that night. Since lots of assignment due the next day, I had stayed back to finish them not realizing it was well past mid night...

As I came out of the the college building, the first thing I noticed was rain, and a lonely pick up truck which was passing by on the street. To beat the cold weather I decided to run home. I had barely taken a few steps that I had a mighty fall due to the slippery surface.

It was embarrassing even that late at night, so I looked up to see if the driver of the truck saw me fall. Well, he or she did. The truck had come to a complete halt.

I got up slowly, picked up my books and other stuffs and started to walk. I glanced at the truck one more time. It was still not moving. It is only when I had taken a few confident steps that the truck started to move again....

Later, I realized what really transpired.

The truck driver saw me fall and take a hit. He or she decided to wait on me to see if I needed any help. When I got up and took some steps, the driver realized that am ok and started to move again.

Its been 25 years, and dont know who the driver of that pick up truck was. I dont even know it was a male or a female, and old man or a young dude my age. The only thing I know is that he or she was a human enough to care about well being of a foreign student in his or her country.

This is how "evil west" treats its students....

The link below shows how we take care of them!

Of course, we are the best!!

http://www.mid-day.com/articles/shocking-mob-strips-parades-tanzanian-woman-as-cops-watch-in-bangalore/16923169

"Lighthouse"

Woh Chota Sa Lighthouse Tha Na..

Jise Tum  Ek safar Se Khareed laayin Thi

Aur Jise Tum Ne Apne Kitchen main Sajaya Tha

Kiya Woh Ab

Bhnawar Main Phanse Kisi Maahi Ko

Raah Dikha Sakta Hai?

Zara Dekho to....

(C) shahid Shahid Parvez Sayed​, December 31st, 2015 @ 2:09am

Sadhna and Asha Parekh

Agha jaani Kashmiri writes in his memories’” Sehar Hone Tak’  that when he narrated the story of ‘Love in Simla’ to S. Mukherjee he asked me go and narrate the same to Shami Kappor. He wanted to sign Shammi for the male lead.

And then a college going kiddo with books walked in and greeted them. When Agha Jaani found out that that kid was the son of S. Mukherjee he said ‘ we have a hero in the house, why sign Shammi?”

But he can’t speak a word of Hindi

I will teach him.

That kiddo later came to be known as Joy Mukherjee.

For Heroine, R. K. Naiyyar, another young man from the stable of S. Mukherjee was adamant that he will only take Sadhna else he will not direct the film.

Another one of S. Mukherje protégé Nasir Husian was adamant that he will only make ‘ Dil Dekho Dekho’ with Asha Parekh.  S. Muekhrje wanted Sadhna to be in that film opposite Sahmmi Kapoor.

S. Mukherjee, the producer gave up on both the occasions…..

 And ‘ Dil Deke Dekho’ was made with Asha Parekh n Shammi Kapoor in 1959.

And this is how ‘ Love in Simla’ was made with Sadhna n Joy Mukehrjee in 1960.

Agha Jaani has to say this about Sadhna " Is ki Zabaan bhi saaf hai, dil bhi saaf hair aur hath bhi saaf hai. Tabiyat ki shareef, Dil ki Shareef, Nazar ki shareef - ye apne shikar ko door se shikar karna jaanti hai aur is trah ke marne wala khushi se jaan de deta hai" - Sehar Hone Tak, 1967

I discovered these geniuses during my college days. My frnds used to love Jeetu and Mithun song n dance routines – but I was in awe of these masters for their arts. I used to see these films ‘alone’ at Imperial Cinema matinee show whenever they were shown..

Even today I see films and plays alone…..

'Tumhi Ekla Chalo Re'... to yaron ki hamehsa se policy rahi hai...

But that’s another story!

Sadhna - RIP

When the good looking people that taught us how to ROMANCE go away, that is when it hits you...hits you hard.....what we are up against.....RIP

Nadira.....

" Why u want to do story on me? I am old...lonely and not doing films?

"Leave that to me, I am the director. I will find the story. Aur jahan tak lonely hone ki baat hai to aap ne Ismat Chugtai ko nahi padhaa? Woh Kehti Hain One can be alone but not lonely - as u have a heart for company!". Aap to shaid Ismat Chugtai Se mili bhi hongi...."

Kiya Naam Hai Tumhara, Baaten to acchi kar lete ho? - She asked.

Right then, I knew.... I got her!

That was Nadira and the year was 1996. I was working for Anupam Kher's media company, and we had a show called " Good shot" on air at Sony TV.

I wanted to do a story on her!

Yesterday, while flipping radio channels as I drove home, I came across an old Vividh Bharti interview of her. Here she was, with her unmistakable voice and rare honesty - baring it all. That interview must have been recorded in the 80s or so I think.

She spoke about many incidents and the one that hit me was about actress Meena Kumari and how she died a lonely death. Nadisa said " Un Se sab Cheen Liya Gyaa tha. Tanha Gayin Woh Duniya Se. Main Ne apne Hathon Se Unhen Kafan Pehnayaa tha"

" Main Ne apne Hathon Se Unhen Kafan Pehnayaa Tha!"

I felt guilty for not taking my story on her further than that phone call. I dont know what she thought of me. I hope she understood that I had a boss....

I came home and googled her only to read about her painful lonely death in 2006, exactly 10 years after I had spoken with her. I felt bad, and thought more about her.

Here She was - the star of the 50s. The most sought after actress for a while, specially after Aan. The first actress to own a Rolls Royce.

A woman who had everything going for her at some point of life....died lonely! Just like her frnd Meena Kumari about whom she had spoken in that interview.

" Un Se sab Cheen Liya Gya tha - Tanha Gayin Woh. Main Ne Khud Apne Hath Se kafan Pehnaya tha Unhen!"

In the case of Nadira we dont even know who did Kafan Dafan for her and where she is buried....

PS: Why we make a big deal out of this thing....this small ...short little life of ours?

Just why?

PPS: The reasons I wrote this entry is to overcome the feeling of guilt that I felt yesterday, for not communicative enough with her! I hope she reads this somewhere....and says " Kiya Naam Hai Tumhara...baaten to acchi karte ho?

RIP, Nadira!

What is wrong with Muslims?

This is it: the Saraansh of what went wrong with Muslim community with each passing decade.

The sign in blue, is from Archaeological Society of India (ASI) and says "this mosque and other 6 mosque were built by Khan e Jahan, a Minister of Feroz Shah of "Hisar" fame and his MOTHER!"

The sign in Urdu is from smart people of the Delhi Waqf Board, which replaces the word mother with FATHER!

So who do u trust?

I wud go with ASI version, rather than from a bunch of 15th century loonies. ASI folks are historians whose bread n butter n passion is History. Whereas loonies.....oh well....we all know what loonies do.

Bottom line is this: We know we are F$&^#@ up BIG TIME, if we are afraid to give a dead woman credit for what she did for the community - 700 years ago....

Moms always know the best...

Mom was furious as I moved closer to take pictures of her kiddos.

She had those "WTF u think u doing?"  kinda expressions.  Exasperated at my refusal to step back, she started indulging in howling n growling or whataver they do to make their points heard.

Passersby told me to stay away from her as she might bite me bad. She is a new  mom and she wont like anyone messing with her kids.

I retreated to the other side of the street, but kept pleading that I found her kiddos to be cute and only wanted picture for FB post. I whistled and things like that.

In a minute her tail started wiggling as if she is saying " alright I love u too - I can see u are harmless... go ahead and take as many pictures u like".

And then she left me alone and went away. But she kept an eye on me from the other side of the street.

I took these pictures with her permissions...

The Universe engages u...if u know how to talk...I always find it easy to "communicate" with strangers, dogs and kids. Its the adult that I have problem communicating!

Ps: That dingy little street has many non veg restaurants, and I dont see her or her kids going hungry. What I am concerned about is with the cold n brutal Delhi weather setting in, how will she take care of them....and it is not just one or two, but bloody 8 of them.

I think she will be just fine....she is a mom....moms always find a way to negotiate hard times!

always!!

Humayun...

Humayun was easy with tears. One can find many examples of him breaking down into tears when something hurt him.

Once he wrote a letter seeking forgiveness from his Harem (wives, mothers, sisters, aunts, daughters) for being negligent in his duties towards them. He told them please sign it so that he can fid peace.... knowing that he is forgiven.

Entire Harem, all his women signed it except ONE!

That one, who REFUSED to sign it, was Bega Begum!

Moral of the story: When your woman does not listen to you, don’t lose heart as she may have other things on her mind.

Other things like building a magnificent tomb over your grave...all with her personal savings...

Not a bad deal...

Mind it!!

Phobia...

Tumhen Maut Ka Phobia Tha

Maut Kisi Ki Bhi Ho

Tum Pareshan Ho Jaatin..

Yaad Hai...

Itwaar Ki Ek Duphar Hum 

Apne Bistar Par

Ek Doosre Main Uljhe Hue Pade The

Ke Main Ne Mazakan Keh Diya Tha

" Kitna Accha Lag Raha Hai na?

Chal Mar Jaate Hain!"

Tum Mujhe Jhatak Kar

Bistar Se Utar Khadi Ho Gayin thin

" Aap Maren, Mujhe Jeena Hai!"

Qudrat Ki Sitam Zareefi Dekho To

Dono Ki Khwahishen Poori Huin Hain

Tum Wahan

Jee Bhi Rahi Ho

Aur Main Yahan

Mar Hi Raha Hoon!

(C) Shahid Parvez Sayed, October 29th, 2015

Dona

Its Dona's birthday today!

For me, Atlanta winter used to begin with her birthday. Every time I wud have dinner with her on this day, we wud talk about winter setting in. I love winters...specially lonley cold winters....they unleash a new world for me.

I loved going out for dinners with her. Flowers in hand I wud show up at her house in the evening. She wud appreciate the flowers first and then wud ask where wud I like go for dinner? Everytime my answer wud be the same " doesn matter, anywhere", but she wud always chose a restaurant that I liked the most.

Thus used to begin my memorable evenings covering all kinds of personal, professional, political and family issues. I wud make her laugh with my stupid comments on issues.  She wud burst out with laughter at my keen sense of observations!

Life is multiple times meaningful as we grow old with friends that love you unconditionally. Nature has been kind to me in bringing these folks in my life!

I miss her today as there is so many issues I need to discuss with her....so many webs to untangle....

PS: On my birthday, she stood for hours at a book store to gift me a signed copy of President Jimmy Carter's autobiography. No one has done this gesture for me....nor anyone else will.....she is special!!

Akbar, the lesser great...

Apparently, Akbar "the lesser great" minted coins with images of Lord Ram and Sita!! ( If I am not mistaken, there is an Akbar Mint at Fathepur Sikri, right below Dargha of Salim Chisti. May be these coins were minted there...)

Imagine a bunch of Mullahs visiting ancient books to pickup images and then seeking approval of Akbar.....they even kept the crown of Lord Ram on his head....thats so cool...

I find the images and calligraphy awesome! (But that's just me!!)

Amal Ramzi Cloony

The fact - "80% of child's intelligence comes from the mother!"

The other fact - All the major religions of the World ( or their followers) want women to be confined to three rooms ie Living Room, Kitchen and the Bed room.

In the words of Mullah Luis Vazquez " Cook and Clean" jobs.

Here is one woman whose parents did not confine her to three rooms nor got her married early. In fact they gave all her all the freedom to choose a career path she wanted for herlsef.

In the end, the most sought after bachelor of our times, went down on his knees to beg her hand. A 

Bachelor who promised and bet money with Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock and Michelle Pfifer that he will never marry. Ever.

Any woman between the age of 19 to 60 would give her arm and a leg to marry George Cloony. He could have married a princess, a Bollywood siren or whatever else he preferred. He chose an unknown human rights attorney from UK.

Why?

I would like to attribute it to the overall personality of Amal Alamuddin. Its a well known fact that Amal Alamuddin is an intellectual and a well read woman who can hold her own in front of Presidents and Prime Ministers of the World. She is intelligent and charming woman who earns her own living by fighting for human rights.

Here is an another example: When my frnd Mirza's Rukhsati was taking place. His father in law took him aside to say just one line " You will be in safe hand, Mirza!". And I think he was ALMOST correct in that assessment. She became a rock like anchor for Mirza in his struggling days....khair woh kisi aur din...

The point is this: Give your girl child room to grow. Help her with new exciting and challenging experiences. Someday she will make you proud of her. Also, as a bonus you will get an intelligent grand child too.

I think the way things are being "stirred and heated" up today, there is a high probability we will end up killing each other. The future would need some dispassionate empathetic intelligent fellas to save this mother earth from ourselves.

PS: These days I ask my frnds, that are proud fathers of teenage daughters whether they will be able to say " You will be in safe hands" to their future son in laws?

Oh well...

Bakri Eid and Ban Ban...

I found Mirza lost in the neighborhood goat market on the eve of the bakri eid. He was absorbing the ever changing dynamics between buyers, sellers and the goats.

He came towards me with puzzled looks

"Ek baat samajah nahi aati"

" Yaar Ye Muslmaan Jab Koi Bakri Dekhta Hai - Khaa Jaane wali Nigha Se Hi Kiyoon Dekhta Hai? Phir Chahe Bakri Apni Ho Ya Parayi"

"Shhhhh Marwaoge? Dheere Bolo"

"Kab Se dekh Raha hoon. Musalmaano Ne Jab Bhi Kisi Bakri Ko Dekha Phaad Kar Khaa Jaane Wali Nigha Se Hi Dekha. Ek Hum Hain ke Nighaon main hi atak jaate hain"

"Isi liye Tumahri Qurabni Kamyab nahi hoti. There are standards for buying goats for Qurabni......unko bakri main Salli boti, Qeema, Paya, Roghan Ghost dikhta hoga"

"Yaar........suno to.."

PS: Since India is in the middle of banning things, places, books, words, films and other good stuff, I have decided to BAN the remaining part of this conversation.

Everybody deserves a power trip!!

Peace. LOL

KAise the Hum...Ye Kiya Ho Gaye?

Yaar Kaise Hum Juda Ho Gaye ?

Acche Khase Be Wafa Ho Gaye

Saath Jeene Marne Ki Kasme

Waade Woh Saare Kiya Ho Gaye?

Chaand, Taare, Phool, Baarish

Manzar Saare Khafa Ho Gaye

Ye Zindagi to Meri Saughaat Thi

Kiya Karz Saare Adaa Ho Gaye?

Jin Se To Mera Koi Rishta Nahi

Wohi Gham Be Panah Ho Gaye

Kal Jo Ek Lamhaa Alag Nahi The 

Aaj Har Janam Juda Ho Gaye

Haseen, Ek Khwaab, Khush Naseeb

Kaise The Hum,Ye Kiya Ho Gaye?

(C) Shahid Parvez Sayed, September 9th, 2015 @ 5:45pm

Dreams of my father...

Today 37 years ago, 4th September, 1977, he left me to figure out the big, bad World on my own!

I am still working on that...

I was playing in the Maidan ( which was a Mangoe, Guva Orchard till he chopped it off) when some frnds came running and informed me.

" Badhsha, Tumahre Chaccha Ko Ghar Le Aaye Hain"

I ran home only to find Mahollah women breaking bangles of my mother. She was only 41 then. I did not know what does that means to be a widow at the age of 41...

That too I had to figure out myself..

I remember when he went to Fategrah hospital and got himself admitted there. His brothers in Mumbai wanted him to be treated at a Mumbai hospital. He refused.

Now I know why did not get treatment at a Mumbai hospital. He was ready to go and wanted to be die and be buried in the family Qabrastan outside our house.

I figured out that too...

What I have not been able to figure out is the complexities or simplicity of a father - son relationship. What it means to be a son? What it means to be a father? How relationship works out and what direction it takes? How do they communicate? Do they use words or assume things out?

I dunno. Yet!

When they carried off his body for Namaz e Janaza, I could not give it a Kandha. I was too young then. I remember walking behind everyone not knowing what to do. No one ever told me anything about his death. Not a word. No one tried to reach me then, or thereafter.

I had to figure out the death part myself. Alone!

When they buried him, I was standing by the lone Guava tree he did not chop off for some reasons. I was quiet and watching the whole thing unfold like a dream. I remember every detail of his face even now.

Later that night I wud go and sit by his grave and cry.

Alone. Still do!

A father is a must in a man's life I would conclude later! A father must try to stay alive till his kids are settled in life. I would figure out later.

When teenage years hit me and I take interest in opposite sex, I would crave to have children first so that I can settle them in my life time. Leaving young children behind to negotiate a cruel, selfish world is not fatherly!

Years later I wud take my in-house girl frnd on her honeymoon, to his grave, his house, his city. She wud just follow me like a true frnd without complaints.

I am yet to figure out why I did that.

I have some of his letter that he wrote to mother. I read them often to know if he had any expectations from me. I was his last child - always a special one in a father's life. I find nothing. No expectations. I guess I was too young for him to think along those lines.

In those letters he calls me ' Shahid Miya'. I enjoy reading that.

" Shahid Miyan, poora din Kahaniyan padhte rehte hain" he writes to mom. He forgets to add that I was a topper in class and had secured a double promotion from 3rd grade to 5th.

So, here I am. Close enough to an age in which he died, yet I feel like 12, as I write these lines...

Nawab Shaddan Miya, sleeps at the feet of his mother under a Tamarind tree he himself had planted as a child. No better place to be buried than by the feet of ones mother.

However, I do wish he had more time. I miss not "communicating" with him. I miss not knowing what he wanted in life. What was his unfulfilled dreams? What kind of a life he lived? Who has hurt him along the way? Who were his frnds and enemies? Things like that

I know I would never be able to figure these out, no matter how many more yeas I live...

Ishq Mahal Ki Shehzaadi...

Be Wafa Thi, Ya Kahen Use Zaalim

Par Sath Wohi To Deti Hai

Mere Sapno Ke Ishq Mahal Main

Ek Shehzaadi Jo Rehti Hai

Jab Waqt, Waqt Pe Ghar Nahi Aata

Aur Raat Ko Deri Hoti Hai

Bahar Sadkon Pe Door Talak Jab

Sunsaan Duphari Hoti Hai

Waise To Hai Himmat Us Main

Par Be-Taab To Thodi Hoti Hai

Mere Sapno Ke Ishq Mahal Main

Ek Shehzaadi Jo Rehti Hai

Jab Chaand Ufaq Par Aataa Hai

Aur Raat Ki Baarish Hoti Hai

Methe Lafzon Main Haule Se

Baad E Saba Kuch Kehti Hai

Aur Ghar Ki Chatt Pe Pade Pade

Har Raat Basar Yu Hoti Hai

Jab Din Naukri Pe Chala Jata Hai

Tab Der Talak Woh Soti Hai

Mere Sapno Ke Ishq Mahal Main

Ek Shehzaadi Jo Rehti Hai

Phir Hijr Ka Mausam Aata Hai

Tab Kon Sath Nibhata Hai?

Qismat Ka Likha Ho Jataa Hai

Kehne Ko To Duniya Kehti Hai

Tab Saari Yaaden Samet Kar Woh

Ek Naye Safar Ko Hoti Hai

Par Jaate Waqt, Palat Kar Woh

Aakhri Baar Kuch Sochti Hai

"Saath Hamara Bas Itna Tha"

Ye Kehti Hai aur Roti Hai

Mere Sapno Ke Ishq Mahal Main

Ek Shehzaadi Jo Rehti Hai

(C) Shahid Parvez Sayed, Sept 3rd, 2015

Internet...what a terrible thing to waste!

One look at the FB time line and u get the feeling how "closed" minds WE have about everything and anything!!

The thoughts...ideology....tradition....culture....wife....GF...children are the best and this is it. And lets not forget the biggest of them all - ur religion! We had once last chance to experience "others" at no cost and we are screwing that up too.

It gets over, even before it begins folks....the journey to something NEW!

Good luck for a journey from yourself to yourself! (with a total distance of travel a mind boggling zero miles in a period of avg 80 years!!)

Internet...what a terrible thing to waste!!