A rebel with a cause..

After a gap of 20 years or so met up with a few old frnds . They come from different backgrounds and socio ec status. They all are hard working, model citizens and good people who broke the glass barriers in the US and moved many notches up on the career ladder. They are living a dream they saw while siping Thambi ka cutting chai in Mumbai. Yet, I found them to be struggling with a few issues which bothered me. Gone are the days when we used to meet each other and solve engineering or applied mechanics problems. These new problems are tough ones are they are mostly the following:

1: The indifference of the wives
2: The growing rebellion of the children

Lets talk about the rebellion first.

It is romantic to be a rebel. Is that’s why these 17 year olds turn into rebels? What is it? It is downhill slope which only adds misery to life of all concerned parties then why we see more kids joining its rank?
Since I know the personalities of my frnds, I can take a calculated risk of analyzing it.

I think the word “huge disappointment” comes before the word “rebellion” comes into play. Them kids when they are going to school, they pick up images and construct a life for themselves. The father mostly has other more workable plans. You throw in no communication and a full blown rebellion is at hands.

Sometimes even communication does not help.

In the known history, there is no bigger rebel I know of other than Aurangzeb. History books are full of his letters detailing his trouble in managing Deccan with meager resources. Since Deccan was full of non agri land and had water shortages, he is seen constantly begging for more land from either Gujarat or Karnaktak from ShahJahan. ShahJhan allowed none and ridiculed him. You throw in his sibling rivalry with Dara and we have a rebel who did not stop rebelling even after ShahJahan was buried inside Taj Mahal.

Later on, all his remaining life he can be seen rebelling against his four sons. He is seen humiliating them in Darbaar and all that good stuff.
Management 101 says “discipline in private, praise in public”, but I guess when you are a king you make ur own rules.

Now, we see new Auarangzeb showing up in modern homes.

The way my frnds are dealing with the issue is this: Those with the money are saying “ My way or the high way”, those without major bank balance have reconciled by saying “ its happening in every house – Vidi Ka Vidhaan. Kiya Kar sakte hain?”.

The other fact that emerges from these stories is that these rebels don’t rebel against any Tom, Dick and Harry. It’s always against someone they love deeply. Additionally they don’t move an inch from the spot the first rebellion broke out.

You all remember the famous scene of Shakti between Dilip and Amitahb at the sea. See it again. Even though Dilip wants something else from that meet, Amitahb still stuck in the past. Not moving an inch.

Sufiism is the way forward someone said. I think its gross injustice to expect these kiddos to think like a sufi at at the age of 17 or so.

I think we should meet them where these rebels want us to meet. Eye to eye. Gentle talk.

Father son relation is the best one in my opinion and can be a source of real fun. There is no better sight than to see a father with his hand on the shoulder of his son watching the sun go down at the nearest sea. Life is all about seeking breadth taking moments. Here is a man who wants best for his son… here is a son who obviously wants to return the favor to his father for all the hard work he did in raising / educating him. They have a lot more at stake then they acknowledge.

In regards to the fist issue, I believe every woman deserves to walk 6 inch above the surface of earth while she is with his man. She undergoes many changes in her after marriage and needs assurance from his man. In the words of an American philosopher Jeff Shipman, “for a woman a pregnancy is like a head-on collision of car. Every part of her body gets affected sometimes beyond repair”. A man must still treat her the way he treated her in the first spring of their life.

A man must make her feel special every time - All the time. All you need is ability to speak ur heart…honestly….humorlessly!

I have done it. It works every time!
Good Luck!!