Monday, July 30, 2007

I love.....

I love women ....that love other women!

Saw this graffiti on a north bound fright train...hmmm

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Ghida Fakhri needs your input....

Ghida Fakhri, Washington DC based news anchor for Aljazeera English News, and as per Mullah Luis, a "Front Page News" herself posted a video on you tube seeking input to improve programs on the channel. Here she is requesting input, and below are few of the actual responses. Hilarious!!

And they say Hollywood / Bollywood are starving for some comedy writers. A couple of guys do give the impression as if they are in Fallujah, Iraq. They are very much here, just don't know it....

The first dude in glasses is a boxer....he is cool...
Enjoy...









Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Dil Dhadakne ka Sabab Yaad Aaya..

During my last visit to India, I experienced a "Philosophically -Romantic" moment. That moment came, tried to grab my attention and after receiving a well deserved attention - went away. As usual I found some humor in it.

Later that day I met a friend and asked him ke " Aakhri baar tera dil kab dhadka tha?" His response generated a good laugh but also made me realize that this issue needs further investigation. I made some phone calls to some well settled, happily married friends and explained what I meant by " Dil Kab dhadka?" and here are some of the responses:

1: Friend A, Married for 9 years - two kids, Businessman.
He thought about it for a L O N G time and then said " Yaar sach bataoon to yaad nahi."

2: Friend B, Married for 8 years - one child, job
He was nostalgic " Shaadi ke Shuru shuru main yaar"

3: Friend C, Married for 8 years, two kids, Real Estate
He took a deep breadth " Jaane de ...tu bhi kaise kasie swaal karta hai?"

I hope you all are with me on this. I did not call some other friends knowing the status of their marriage, as I did not want to hurt them. But this was a disturbing thread that I discovered in these supposedly happily married couples. These were the every day jebronis that one comes across in campuses all over the world. These were the happy go lucky guys who used to bunk classes, hang out with girl friends, spend time in the canteen, sit in the back rows and perform the plays that I used to write back then.

What is going on in here folks? What happened to that love and romance that brought them closer in the first place?

I was expecting their responses along the following lines.

- " Jab biwi apna favorite song gununati hue mere seene pe apna sar rakh deti hai na - tab" ( Mullah says he would rather see his heart stop on this one!)

- Jab barishon ke kisi Sunday - mere liye bhajiye pakate wakt apna hath jala leti hai phir bhi apna dard bhool kar ye poochti hai ke bhajiye tasty hain – tab”.

- Jab woh kisi public place main apna dupatta utar kar mere gale main kisi mahobbat ki malaa ki trah daal deti hai - tab"

May be I am missing something here. May be 10 years of marriage and a couple of kids, work and societal pressure and responsibilities do this to you. May be men and women have always been incompatible creatures. May be men - women relation is always based on emotions and emotions come with high and low tides. May be romance is a gimmick played by NATURE to get a boy and a girl get hooked up for the production of babies. May be WE all got it wrong, and may be this is how it has been, and this is how it will be!

The question remains how in the world these couples are going to spend next thirty years together?

I don’t know --- neither do they, I suspect!

This is how it is in un-romantic lane…

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Mullah, Google, and a Mule...

Mullah Luis has been insisting that I buy Google stocks for some time now. Today, he came back with the most convincing argument. He said Google has adopted a policy of making a new employee sign a bond saying " He / She will not act like jerk while working for Google". Now as you can imagine that got my attention.

Dictionaries define jerk as "a dull stupid fatuous person", but in day-to-day life, we tend to associate this it with arrogant, Holier then thou, stupid person. Now, I have found a real reason to invest my hardly earned money in some technology stocks. I see a great potential in Google for changing the way we live, play and do business.

Google is a pioneer in new management practices with strong fundamentals and where every one has a floating office space. There is no ego building activity associated with " my office, my desk and my room with that blonde's view". They all share their office space with one another. Google also provides first-class dining facilities, gyms, laundry rooms, massage rooms, haircuts, carwashes, dry cleaning, commuting buses—just about anything a hardworking engineer might want.

My point here is not to talk about the fringe benefits that come with working for Google but that one principle of making sure " no one acts like a jerk". Imagine if this practice is adopted all over the world; in every major state capitol, every legislature, university, Madarssa, convent, Vidyalya and any other place we assemble in groups.

Imagine powerful world leaders not acting like jerks to weaker nations, big corporations not acting like jerks to mom and pop stores, and restaurant chains not acting like jerks to that Rs 200/day earning Vada-Paav vendor in Mumbai.

A few months back, I was giving a sermon to a bunch of 20 year olds in Mumbai, (that is because folks of my age do not pay attention to me anymore!!!) and this jebroni started working furiously on his cell phone. By the time I finished he came back saying " Shahid bhai, you are right I just Googled it and your information is correct". Fortunately it was one of those rare occasions when I was speaking the truth - (Warna Apna to ye hisab hai ke jhoot bolna seekha nahi, aur sach bolna ataa nahi!)

Google ushered the World in web 2.0 and right now working on web 3.0. I do not know what shape and form web 3.0 would be, but imagine a political meeting somewhere in India where a hate mongering, venom spitting politician is using false information and twisting facts to arouse hatred among communities. Imagine emotions running high and the crowd getting ready to attack the other community with the intent to kill them, rape their women, and destroy their livelihoods. Just then, Imagine, just then a jebroni getting up to say "Sir, I just Googled the facts that you have quoted, and it seems like you are a F**** liar"....

Imagine....

Mullah also said that" A decent man must have a few acres of land, shares of Google and a mule!"

Let me start with the mule first...

Monday, July 16, 2007

A daughter is a daughter....


A senior jebroni once said " A son is a son - TILL he gets a wife, but a daughter is a daughter her ENTIRE life!"

Fellow traveller and excellente journalist, Indescribe provided the proof and I am going to let him do the talking. Here is the link to his blog...

http://indscribe.blogspot.com/

Re- Read it from the point of view of that Brahmin couple people. You just saw some Gods in action down in Chennai....and please do not blame me if, you, at the end of this article discover a lump in your throat!

This is how it is in the humanity lane....

Pic Courtsey: trivialmatters.blogspot.com

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Ek Zara sa...


I have received some cool messages in response to my " Raat abhi bhi baki hai " nazam. Folks, were inquisitive ke "kaun chod ke gyaa mujh jaise Hero ko, aur koi mujhe chod bhi kaise sakta hai?". ( Mera to swaal hai koi mujhe kiyoon nahi chod sakta? - Aisi kiya khas baat hai mujh main?)

I want to put the matter to rest. This blog is not a running commentary of my life. My life is not so interesting yet to be broadcast live on the blog. If each of my posts were an aankho dekha haal then it would be evident from last three post ke:

1- Some one left me
2- I fell in love
3- some one broke my heart again...

Itni speed to B-Grade ki Malyalam picture main possible hai.....C grade ki apni life main nahi!!

Well, seriously speaking the truth is, as a writer, you absorb things and you incubate them for sometime. Those emotions of yours and others show up from time to time in speeches and writings. I do not have to experience good-bye to write the pain and agony of it.

I do not have to be in Kargil and Iraq to write how terrible wars could be, and what happens when a fighter jet with 5000 pounds of payloads flies over your neighbourhood. When your kids wake up crying and when your blood boils and you feel so helpless. Your wife breaks down, fearing if the smart bomb comes crashing on her garden of heaven, there will be nothing left of them to bury in the morning. Democracy provides level playing fields for everyone - even in death!

I write for those emotions folks - I have been writing them for thousands of years and will continue to write them under new pen names.

That is the difference between a jebroni and a good writer - I am just trying to promote myself from a jebroni to a writer. - that's all!

BTW I would be surprised if that nazam " Raat Abhi bhi baki hai" does not show up in my next film...

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

I wish I had directed this Gem...



King Vijay Anand at his best in this romantic-comedy called " Tere Ghar ke Saamne"- (1963)

Shot at the real Qutub Minaar and Mehboob Studio Mumbai, this song is one of my favorite ones. Apart from great shairi and music ( Hasrat and S.D.) this songs shows the genius of Vijay Anand in song picturisation. This song is a sheer work of poetry done with lights and camera.

The 6 minute long scene along with this song, had Dev and Nutan wearing the same dress and were shown to be at the same location. This is one of those rare songs where diector chose LOVE as the only prop.

When they walk up the stairs of Qutub Minar, Nutan was shown to be struggling with the decision wether to trust this man with her life. When she comes down the same stairs, she feels liberated, free, happy because a decision has been made- she is in love! Notice how she raises her both hands in the air as wind blows in - she seems to be declaring something to the World. No other actress could have deleivered those expressions better then Nutan.

When a girl / woman raises her hands like that she knows that she just entered a new phase, a 7th heaven in her life. I wish that every girl gets a chance to raise her hands like that atleast 1 time and maximum of 2.5 times in her life!!

You can't get better then this......the song not only shows romance but the cultural ethose, the purity of emotions, the trust......I can go on and on.....

Ps: The guy who shows up in the middle of the song wearing glasses is Vijay Anand himself….

This is how it is in the Creative-Fulfillment Lane...

Friday, July 06, 2007

Raat Abhi Bhi Baaki Hai....




Ye Raaten to ab khoob katengei
Tumhen mil kar main ne socha tha
Un Roshan, Roshan Aankhon main
Jab Suraj sa Kuch Dekha tha...

Jungle, Bayaban, Sunsaan the Saare
Maidaano main bhi Tanhayee Thi
Nadiyan Chup Chup Behti thin aur
Manzil Apni Abhi Nahi Aayee thi ?

Phir bhi Hum-Tum Chal to Rahe the
Un Lambi Ghaneri Palkon ke Peeche
Khwaab Mere Kuch Pal to Rahe the..

Khwaab bhi Kaise Kaise the Woh?
Aanken, Maatha, Naak aur Palken
Bas Hum-Tum Jaise Jasie the Woh

Roshan Cheraa Jo Mujh pe Gyaa tha
Aankhen bhi to Bilkul Meri hi thin
Maathe ki woh Chand Lakeeren
Sach Sach kaho kiya mujh si na thin?
Haan Yun hi Tumhen Khush Karne ko
Bas Muskaan Tumhari Maangi thin..

Par Hum-Tum Shaid Bhool Gaye the
Ke Jungle main Kuch Naag bhi hain
Roti hain Mahobatten jinhen sun kar
Jeevan main Kuch Aise Raag Bhi hain..



Jana Tum To Jaa Bhi Chuki Ho
Par Raat Abhi Bhi Baaki Hai...
Lamha Lamha Hum ne Bune jo
Woh Khwaab Abhi Bhi Baaki Hain

Woh Raat Abhi Bhi Baakai hai...

Folks: This Nazam just descended a few hours ago. No need to get emotional about it. Well, the story is, when I returned from work I found that a teacup, which I had forgotten to throw in the sink, was lying by my computer, so were the socks, and that junk mail from yesterday. No one had arranged all these things to their proper places.... Bas khodpi kharab ho gayee...aur ye phir nazam hogayi.

Ulti seedhi jaisi bhi hai, I am sharing an un-edited version with you’ll. This goes to prove how much I trust the readers of my blog....

Peace...Raat abhi bhi Baaki hai......

Ps: Kash ke who saale Moze, who chai ka cup apni jagah pe hote to ye sab to nahi likhna padta …...(not that I regret writting whatever showed up in my heart...)

(C) 2007 - Shahid Sayed

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Apna Manohar is back....

I was waiting at the airport to pick up Manohar and saw him coming out from the South Terminal at the Atlanta Airport. He has such an expressive face and eyes, that you can see from miles the trauma and struggles that he is going through.

Me: Daant main dard hai?

Manohar gave no resonse. He was looking tired and hurt.

Me: Batwaa Chori ho gaya flight main?

Me: News thi, kisi Desi ne chalti flight se UDI maarne ki koshish ki….tum to nahi ….

Manohar: Sahid Bhai aap har cheez ka mazak kiyoon udate hain?

Me: Gaur se dekho meri jaan – Har cheez apna mazak uda rahi hai….nahi?

Manohar: Ab kiya aap kavita karnege?
Me: Baap log ke lafde main apne se kavita nahi hoti – Haan tumhari mashook ke bare main kcuh arz karoon?

He was a disheartened man. Somewhere in between the state of broken, and broken- again. I had convinced him to go back and repair relations with his father. I thought this is the time he needs some un-conditional love, which can only come from parents. Sesnitive folks can tolerate any catastrophe except the one that involves emotions. I thought this time it is going to work out between them, and he will return to pack up his stuff for good - Appeartnly his Dad had other plans.

I fail to understand why people in India are not expressive? What is wrong in expresing your feelings for the one you love? A friend of mine was experiencing some natural strains in a married life. I suggested – requested - pleaded – forced – blackmailed him to take flowers to his wife of 10 years, express your feelings for her and enjoy what Jeff calls “ magical moments”.

Abhi tak nahi le gaye ab kiya le jaoon? was the response.

I tried his wife too, with the same results! (FYI, I tried his wife too = I asked her to take flowers to her hubby. God, You Perverts!)

What’s going on folks? Granted love can never be at the mercy of words to be experienced, but we are living in a fast paced, goal oriented, stressed out world, agar thoda bol doge to kiya pagaar kam ho jayegi?

We do not realize by doing this we are setting an example for our kids, nieces and nephews to follow for the rest of their lives. I never saw my parents, brothers, friends express their love the way in needs to be expressed. Human beings are wired to receive messages using all four senses i.e. eyes, ears, nose and touch. Are we letting these four sensor do the talking?

A Caucasian friend of mine who is married a Mallu from Kerala professes his love for his wife of 7 years whenever she calls, and she calls at least 15 times a day. Do the math. Assuming he says those three words to her 20 times a day, the total comes down to 7280 times a year. (Assuming that they stay married for 40 years the grand total comes to 219,000 times.) I doubt if any Keralites married to any other Jebroni from India hears those three words 7000 times in her life time?

Coming back to apna Manohar, I did not know what to do with him? Apna yaar hai kuch to karna hi tha. The problme is my cowardice or ”Buz-Dili” has not allowed me to find some adda, where I could take a broken hearted friend for repair. You know the kind you see in films for “ gham galat karne ke liye”, and there are plenty of those in this country. Instead, I offered him a Bookstore, Mandir, Masjid and Church as an alternative to hang around for a while till he feels good.

Finally, We settled for a Gurudwara kiyon ke wahan langar hota hai, aur kuch na kcuh khaane ko mil hi jataa hai.!!!